KOMPAS.com - Relationships that have lasted so long to provide many benefits for you. Si he will always be supporting your partner, the partner who has given you the heart of sweet fruit-sweet, and of course a warm sexual connection, which is only produced by the intimacy that has become over the years.However, often you miss the times when you first make a new intimate relationship with him. That is when you feel the pulse awaiting these critical moments, coy when you have to open the shirt, even crying when you have to feel how integrates with him. This kind of longing that you may not get back. You do not even need hard work to recapture the moment.
Temporarily separated
Many couples who want to become a good friend, partner, or soul mate, one another. Ties of this kind cause a feeling of warm and safe, but can do away with a sense that we are interested in the first pair. "Most of the things that ditumbuhkan by love, such as proximity, stability, and security, can kill passion and desire in the relationship," said Esther Perel, Ph.D., author Mating in Captivity. "For the desire, you need to remember how the first time with the first: You do not meet him every day, and you do not depend on it. If you always have for my husband, too open to one another, you will lose your limits."
Therefore, for your sex life, make the distance with the first husband. "Separate" briefly, the physical and emotional, can stimulate sexual desire, such as when you first court, as according to Patti Britton, Ph.D., author The Complete Idiot's Guide to Sexual Massage. "When you deliberately create distance between you and your partner, without feeling conscious of You tertantang. And the 'obstacles' that appears deliberately that can increase your appetite with one another," Britton tukas.
Browse the old activity
Intimate touch with the new pair feels stir because the first time made. "What makes sex exciting is the first time because there is no other sensation that is not known, and anticipate what might happen," said sex therapist Georgia home, It Gloria Brame, Ph.D. "You are still exploring the body of a partner, and seek to stimulate a variety of one another." To be able to recapture the sensation, you need to browse the same routines.
Classic way to back up is a sexual journey with, either a week, a few days, or even just a night. Titipkan children on the grandfather-grandmother, then turn off the phone so that you can only tandem without interruption. Visit the places to eat that often you visit, your location or honeymooners. Maya (40) and her husband, Tyo (37), not the actual name, often the road Sabang, Central Jakarta, just enough to nongkrong in a stall-stall which they visit when Maya is still in kos kawaann, and 12-13 years ago. "This is to remember when we were still difficult," Tyo prank on Kompas.com.
You can also look back, what do you make a first turn on the husband. What aroma body? What you remember when the honeymoon? Balinese gamelan whether events that accompany your breakfast in the hotel? How do you feel when you first open the fashion show before? Fokuslah in sexual activity that helps you find again the old passion.
Increase return hormone dopamine
Ingatkah your stomach when you feel heartburn when he began to kiss you? According to Helen Fisher, Ph.D., professor of anthropologi at Rutgers University and author Why We Love, a stir when paired with a production of hormones dopamine and norepinephrine, nerve transmission is responsible for this feeling. "Hormone testosterone is also up in the nervous system to improve your sexual passion."
The good news, that we can seek a hormone that gives a feeling that sensation again. All types of activities pendongkrak adrenalin, in the room or outside, increasing the dopamine content in the brain, are capable of the same excitement when you first met, said Fisher. So you want to membuktikannya, try a variety of activities that challenge you, such as rafting, biking to the outside of the city, or even watch horror movies that you avoid this. This is also an aphrodisiac, something that stimulates carnal desire. Or would like to try a more "direct"? Make up in the room with the door open also cause feelings stir.
"Go out of your comfort zone will give you the sensation 'I can trust are doing this', which can encourage the adrenalin when you do rock climbing," said Gloria Brame.
Fast first
When the court, you may apply the rule that he can kiss your new after three months. Or, you explore the various ways in order to satisfy themselves with one another without doing intercourse. And because you create such a restriction, the event finally smooch and touch it to be so "hot". You can get back with pleasure does not make a sexual relationship for a week, two weeks or a month, according to the agreement, both of you.
"Say that you want to have fun doing the session with the making out and foreplay is often used to do. Therefore, oral sex and intercourse can not be done while," said Brame. "Explain that does not make while making sexual akan akan increasingly intense and sexy when you finally do it again." You may also be looking for new ways to mutually satisfying couple. You are able to do during, and after not able menahannya more intimate relationship akan feel so horrible as the first first time.
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